brb crying

033: klay thompson, grief, and the loves we never really lose

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What do Klay Thompson leaving the Golden State Warriors and a viral TikTok about a grandfather visiting his wife's grave have in common? Apparently everything. :')

This week, Nins explores why Klay Thompson's departure from the Golden State Warriors became a surprisingly emotional lesson about endings, identity, and honoring the past.  Arns follows with a viral TikTok about a grandfather visiting his late wife's grave that beautifully captures enduring love and grief. Together, they discuss what it means to treasure the people, experiences, and seasons of life that shape us—even after they're gone.

In this episode:

  • Klay Thompson's emotional departure from the Golden State Warriors
  • The psychology of sports fandom and attachment
  • The viral TikTok that made millions cry
  • Love, grief, memory, and what survives change
  • Why endings don't erase what came before

If you've ever struggled to let go of a relationship, a chapter of life, a dream, or a version of yourself, give this one a listen.

Content warning: grief, loss

0:00 - Intro
3:37 - Nins: Klay Thomspon
41:21 - Arns: grieving grandparent TikTok
58:34 - Outro

Referenced in this episode:

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brb crying—hosted by longtime best friends Nins & Arns—is a podcast where we explore the songs, books, TV shows, films, pop culture moments, and personal stories that help us laugh, cry, heal, and feel a little less alone. Crying is our superpower, and by sharing what makes us cry in a way that makes us laugh, we show how crying helps us connect with ourselves and each other.

Intro

SPEAKER_03

Hi, I'm Angela Nann.

SPEAKER_01

I'm Ariana Kempis.

SPEAKER_03

And this is BRB Crying.

SPEAKER_01

Hello everyone. Welcome back to BRB Crying. I'm Ariana, also known as Arnz. And I'm Angela, also known as Ninz.

SPEAKER_03

And you're gonna love this one. Oh. Premeditated. I've been holding onto this one for a few weeks. We are here to giggle about our sniffles. Okay. You know?

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Podcast where we, your two best friends, basically talk about anything. Because if we think about it for long enough, we'll find a reason to cry about it. Yes, yes. You know?

SPEAKER_01

Mm-hmm. If you're new here, welcome to our podcast. If you're old here, hello there, crybabies. Missed ya. Missed you. Love ya. How are ya? Good? Yeah. Us two.

SPEAKER_03

Um, how are you? Good. It's weird to ask since we hung out all day yesterday. Yes. But they don't need to know that though. Let's just pretend. Um I had like a really bad hormonal acne breakout a few weeks ago. Just needed to be humbled a little bit. We all do. So appreciated that. Thank you. I love that way of, you know, like, oh, this makes me better. This makes me stronger. I'm so happy that I look like this. I'm so happy that people get to see this version of me. Um, thank you, body. Thank you, body. Such a miracle you are every day. So just dealing with that. Okay, you know. But you look beautiful. Thanks. I mean, always, but always. You know, how about you?

SPEAKER_01

How have you been? I've been good. Yeah. Yeah. That's good. I take it day by day, and if I get more than six hours of sleep, solid. Yeah. I'm chilling. Look at you. Look at me. I'm radiant today. The energy between episodes is crazy.

SPEAKER_03

It's volatile.

SPEAKER_00

It is volatile here.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. It's kind of nice though, because I genuinely feel like we have given ourselves enough buffer between recordings to really like come back with fresh new vibe. Yeah. You know?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_03

Can't say it's always gonna be great.

SPEAKER_01

No. But it's just our raw, authentic selves. It's just like our emotions. Yeah. You never know. But we we take them as they come. Yeah. No judgment. That's why you listeners have to come back week after week. Oh, what am I gonna get this time? Yeah. What kind of ninins? What kind of arms am I gonna get, you know? By week after bye week, is that how? By week after bye-week, you know? Really nice ring to that. Catchy. Yeah, we we don't really have any announcements here. We now have decided to stop announcing things on the pod. So if you want to catch up with what we're doing in real time, check us out on Instagram at beer be crying.podcast. Short and sweet. Short and sweet.

SPEAKER_03

Just like my story today. Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01

Ha ha. Just kidding. Ninz warned me that this is a long one. She she warned me maybe five times. So I know that this might be her longest story yet. So strap the fuck in, everyone. My god. Let's just let's just get into it. Let's get into it. Let's just get into it.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

Nins: Klay Thomspon

SPEAKER_03

So I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little nervous about my story today. Okay. Not because not because it's a personal one, but because I don't because I don't really know if I'm super qualified to talk about this topic. All the more reasons.

SPEAKER_01

We love being humbled.

SPEAKER_03

We are starting off so strong today. We are losing all my credibility. Um we're getting a little sporty spice today. Okay. And she becomes a certified bullshitter about sports ball. Sports ball? Yeah. That's the name of all sports to me. Oh. I was like, is that a sport I don't know about? Whoa. Okay. Yeah, add it to our never-ending uh repertoire here. Um okay, so like I mentioned, this is not a personal story, obviously. Uh please. This is about your little league, your little league pilots. Okay. Because, you know, I I have dabbled here and there, especially when it comes to Bay Area sports teams. If you don't know, me and Arn's from the Bay. Yeah, specifically a fan of the Golden State Warriors and the San Francisco 49ers. And this is all largely due to being married to my husband. I I could not not be a fan of these teams because he is a diehard. I just I had no choice. It's always on in her house, and even if it's like a random November night, I am just like inundated with sports in the background in our household. Okay. So, you know, you pick up a few things. Yeah. And before you come for me and label me as a bandwagon fan, don't bother because I know that's exactly what I am. Same dude.

SPEAKER_01

Proud of it. Here to own it.

SPEAKER_03

Let us have fun. Let us have fun. Let me live. My God. My God. So, no surprise, even though I'd grown up with Warriors games like, you know, just like kind of on in the background. It's no surprise that I didn't become like an actual big fan of them until 2015, when all of a sudden the Warriors got like kind of good. And they won the NBA finals for the first time in 40 years. Again, so please, sorry that I found that fun and exciting.

SPEAKER_00

Sorry I wanted to participate in that.

SPEAKER_03

Sorry, I just I just feel like sports fans are like so smug. Yeah. You know, and it's like No one cares. No one cares that you were a fan first. No, but like I get it because I'm also really smug about being an Ariana Grande fan. I guess. But okay, yeah, just let me let me let me babble about this today, okay? Blabble, babble, babble. Let me babble about this today. Okay. Anyway, so ever since that 2014-2015 season, I really began to take more of an interest in the NBA and the Warriors and Steph Curry, and really enjoyed watching even regular season games. Not even just the playoffs, like look at me, you know? What a fan. I'm saying I'm hardcore. Yeah. It was obviously because the Warriors were just like fucking dominating for like a decade. But also because it was something that Lou and I could bond over. You know, it was just so fun to watch this together and talk about it together and root for something. And I just found it like really unifying, and you know, there's like community around it. There's a reason why sports dominate the world. This is us explaining sports. This is it. We are just really enlightening that way. Sports are about togetherness. Look at us, you know. So, anyway, as all fans come to experience, I started to really like certain players and started having all these like parasocial ideas about who they are on and off the court. And I enjoyed listening to their interviews and all these edits of these like funny, silly, insightful. You'll find out. You'll find out. I, of course, followed them on socials and kept up on the hot goss about them and all of their fucking stunning wives and girlfriends. Topic you and I will get into another day. Love that. Now, the hardest part about being a sports fan when you are a the Lulu emotional and empathetic girly pop princess is that you get really attached to certain players on your team. So what happens when, like all things, your team changes over time and a player you loved for the past decade is suddenly traded. How do you how do you process this? How do you mourn this? How do you honor this? Well, let's find out by taking a look back at Klay Thompson's trade to the Dallas Mavericks and his first game back at Chase Center against his former team, the Golden State Warriors.

SPEAKER_01

Let's get into it.

SPEAKER_04

Are you already getting Tyrion?

SPEAKER_01

No! No, but I I had a feeling this is where this was going. Okay.

SPEAKER_03

So, sources for today, um, a shit ton, because I don't know anything. Sorry, had to rely on the trusty old internet for this. A YouTube video uploaded by House of Highlights, two articles by Anthony Slater for The Athletic, a CBS sports article by Jordan Bagalinawan, a sports news article by Edward Satalen, a TikTok by user at footballfangirl123, an NBC Sports Bay Area article by Jared Castillo, a Yahoo Sports article by Ali Thanawala, and an article for the Associated Press for the NBA by James McAuley. Okay, let's let's back it the fuck up first. Okay. Lay out that cook-a-cook-a-context. Honestly, this entire story is just context. Sometimes it's like You know what I mean? Okay. So Clay Thompson is a professional basketball player in the NBA. He was first drafted in 2011 by the Golden State Warriors and played 13 seasons with them before being traded to the Dallas Mavericks in 2024. With the Warriors, he became a four-time NBA champion and a five-time NBA All-Star. For sure, like one of the main characters of the Warriors dynasty. He was one half of the iconic Splash Brothers duo alongside this other up-and-coming player, Steph Curry.

SPEAKER_01

Never heard of him.

SPEAKER_03

Watch out for him. He has a lot of potential.

SPEAKER_01

Okay.

SPEAKER_03

Um, Clay is a huge, huge fan favorite. We love him. We love him. Simply put, there would be no Warriors dynasty without Clay. On the Warriors, he was an incredible two-way player, meaning that he was one of their top scoring players who averaged 20 plus points a game, but he was also one of their best defenders, responsible for guarding people like, I don't know, LeBron James. Who? Other up-and-coming watch out for him. Okay. He's got a big future. I gotta write this down. I cannot mention Clay's career without also mentioning his greatest highlights and most iconic and record-setting moments. 2016, big year for Mike King, okay. In a game against Sacramento, he drops 37 points in a single quarter. Did you watch this game? Probably. I don't remember.

SPEAKER_01

Crazy. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03

It was crazy. You know, like in the F1 movie where like Brad Pitt's talking about how everything just clicks and like you're just flying. Yeah. It was it was watching that in real time. It was incredible.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Lou said that he only dribbled 11 times that quarter. What? Insane. That same season, he earns the moniker game six clay by scoring 41 points against the Oakland City. That's not right. Against the Oklahoma City Thunder. Please don't edit that out. During game six of the Western Conference Finals. A big deal. Because the Warriors were down 3-2, so if they lost that game, they were out. 2018, he then sets the NBA record for most threes hit in a game. 14. I can guarantee you I have not made 14 three points in my life. Total. The entire 21 years of it. Just kidding, I'm 32. This guy's crazy. And as mentioned, he is one of the core reasons the Warriors won the NBA championships in 2015, 2017, 2018, and 2022. Like I said, very big deal. My king, my captain. Okay. So now I have to take a quick little break because I know that not everyone is a Warriors fan. Or maybe even a basketball fan. I know that people have their biases and their loyalty to their own teams and their own set of interests. And maybe you don't even give a single shit about any sport, which I get it. I understand this. It is hard to give a shit about a player on a team you don't care for or in a sport you don't follow. So instead of me continuing to focus on Clay's career highlights, might I remind you that he is in fact human, a real person? So let me tell you a little bit more about who he is, aside from this incredible freak athlete. So Clay Thompson, born on February 8th, 1990, in Los Angeles, California. Aquarius. He's 35 years old, six foot five, and an Aquarius. Meaning he doesn't respond to texts or phone calls.

SPEAKER_04

No.

SPEAKER_03

And he loves disappearing for weeks at a time by escaping into nature. He is in his own world. And I say is he living in his own. We are all happily living in his own world. Okay. His parents were also notable athletes. His dad, Michael Thompson, played 12 seasons in the NBA and won two championships with the Los Angeles Lakers. And his mom was a D1 college volleyball player. So his entire childhood with him and his two other brothers, a lot of sports. Clay is super competitive, chronically late, outdoorsy, especially when it comes to water, and loves fishing, snorkeling, scuba diving, and boats. He would literally commute to games via boat. He would take his little fishing boat and just sail it across the bay and like go to games and then like drop 41 points. Relatable. Or he would like kayak to practice. Because he wouldn't be tired enough from the practice. He was like, no, I gotta like kayak to and fro. And he would just like live stream himself on the water, you know, just fucking like vibing, you know. Earned himself another moniker, Captain Clay. Clay loves reading and writing and journaling. And he says that when he retires, he'd really just love to be a high school P teacher. Oh my god. When he's not competing, his personality is super laid back and so unintentionally funny. You know, like when people are they're like not trying to be funny, but just everything that they do because you just love their vibe so much, it's like hilarious to you. And he has like this like really deep and slow monotone voice. And so one example of this is when he won his first championship. You know, they're doing all the all the fanfare, right? The confetti, and he's getting interviewed. And he's on the mic and he's just like, Yeah, I can't believe it. I mean, I knew it was a possibility, but seeing it in real time, holy cannoli.

SPEAKER_01

Oh cannoli.

SPEAKER_03

And then during like post-game interviews, you know, I always have like press conferences and stuff. He'll be like on the mic, just just folding away a paper airplane, just doing a little origami and then just like throwing it out into the crowd, you know? Yeah, just a goofy little guy. Yeah. No, he's not, he's 6'5. Um so in 2019, everything is going great, obviously. The Warriors have already won three championships and were in the finals for the fifth year in a row when in game six against the Toronto Raptors, Clay Thompson gets fouled during an attempted dunk. Lou wanted me to say, fuck you, Danny Green. And Clay falls awkwardly and he tears his ACL. This is a massive injury and automatically puts players out for an entire year. Oh fuck. He's taken to the locker room, time out on the floor, dub nation devastation. Okay. Everyone at home is like hands on head, you know, aghast. You know, just, oh fuck, what are we gonna do? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

What are we gonna do collectively? What are we gonna do about this?

SPEAKER_03

This is like a huge deal. This motherfucker Clay comes back out of the locker room, lit literally limps back out onto the floor, and he's like, nah, I'm gonna go shoot my free throws, and then I'll leave. He makes his two free throws and then exits the game. Fucking legend. You know what I mean? So the Warriors end up losing the 2019 finals. Such a shame because at this point they've only won three in the last five years. Embarrassing. You know what I mean? Yeah. And from there, Clay spends the next year recovering from his injury. Okay, so NBA seasons are typically from October to June. So he misses the entire next season, the 2019 to 2020 season. And it's it's that weird one that's in lockdown where they were like in a bubble.

SPEAKER_01

So, like Honestly, Honestly, no, that was a fascinating little case study, the way that they did it. It was weird.

SPEAKER_03

Like, like I wouldn't want to be in there. Oh, yeah. Good timing, I guess. I'm sure he wouldn't not agree with that. But um, yeah, that was weird. Anyway, then because of COVID, the 2020 to 2021 season was pushed out and didn't start until December of 2020. So this whole time, it's been about a year and a half now since his first injury. Clay is getting back in shape, he's conditioning, he's going to practice. He's fucking locked in. He's like, I'm ready to come back. But just one week before the season is set to start, in a pickup game during practice, he suffers another injury to his lower leg. And we all know what that means. He tore his fucking Achilles tendon. Clay is out again for another year. In an interview Clay Thompson did for Headstrong, which advocates for mental health and sports, Clay calls this time the darkest days of his life. He was like, Yeah, I could kind of get like why the first injury happened. Like I was going so hard for five years, but it's like when the second one happened, it's like, it's like, what the fuck? No, that's so fucked. It's fucked. He said he kind of isolated himself, again, Aquarius, but he really had to like lean on his friends and family during this time. And he actually connected with this life coach named Tony Robbins. You'll love this. Tony taught Clay a few techniques to kind of deal with this emotional toll and distress. And they literally were techniques like just yell, just go around your house and yell. Just let it out and scream. And Clay said he found it so silly, but one of them was just literally looking myself in the mirror and screaming, I'm a fucking warrior, which I really love. Yeah. So Clay spends another year rehabbing his Achilles and finally comes back in January of 2022 after 941 days since that first injury.

SPEAKER_00

That's so fucked.

SPEAKER_03

That's so fucked. Fucked. Yeah. But six months later, the Warriors win their fourth championship in seven years. Okay. I I like I kind of get why everyone hates the Warriors. Hate us because you ain't us.

SPEAKER_02

Us.

SPEAKER_03

I did something to 100%. My God.

SPEAKER_02

Indispensable.

SPEAKER_03

Truly. Okay. But after that fourth win, the team heads into summer training, and that's really kind of like when athletes like really focus on getting their bodies back in shape. And during this time, Clay says he. He hit this mental block and he actually stopped playing during that summer. In an interview he did with Anthony Slater for The Athletic, he says, I worked so hard that summer. I just didn't play pickup. I worked really hard. I did weights. I did conditioning. I did individuals. I just didn't play pickup. I think for good reason. Because the last time I played, it was so traumatic. I don't regret it at all just because of the emotional toll those last two and a half years took. So that kind of gives you an idea of the headspace that Clay was probably at at the start of the 2022-2023 season. And overall for the Warriors, that season was pretty rough. Clay himself had a really rocky start. You know, he was he was forcing shots, getting easily frustrated on the court, and just inconsistent. And even though he personally glowed up by the end of the season and was back to hitting 20 plus points per game, the damage had already been done. People, people were starting to talk. Now, so far, I have been spitting facts. All of this can be substantiated by my fucking 50 different sources. But we are now going, we not we're not gonna straddle into uh speculation territory, you know? This is when we start putting words in their mouth? A little dabbling and deducing. Okay. You know? I I will obviously try to continue to pull from facts, and hopefully I will be very clear when I'm starting to insert my own thoughts. And my first thought is this how quickly do fans forget about how much they loved something once things start to go bad? The Warriors and Clay have another tough start to the season in 2023 and 2024. People start talking shit online. Clay, you're washed. Clay, get off the floor. Clay's headed for the Shanghai Sharks. Which, can I just say, what is it okay, it is the most unoriginal piece of shit talk that every single Twitter troll says to an NBA player that doesn't have a good game. It's basically saying you're gonna be taken out of the USA NBA League and you're gonna be shipped over to another country where they don't have like as competitive of a league. It is so overused, and I'm really tired of haters having no originality. Like, let's let's come up with something new. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? Okay. Anyway. I I don't know Clay yet. I don't know what was really happening behind the scenes or how he was really feeling during this time. I can only guess. And I mean, I think that all professional athletes, or like anyone famous really, they they have to have thick skin to do what they do. It just comes with the territory. So who who knows if he even gave a single shit about what people were saying about his game? But I can imagine that someone as competitive as Clay didn't even need all that noise because I would think that his own worst critic during this time was probably himself. When his shots weren't going in, when for the first time since his rookie year he was playing off the bench instead of starting, when he had to fight for more minutes to be on the floor. And to add even more pressure to this situation, all of this was happening at a time when his contract was set to expire. Were the warriors going to keep him? Would Clay be satisfied with the offer? Again, this is this is more speculating from me. But I can imagine how painful it must have been to go through everything that he did those last two and a half years, come back knowing that he could be better, and wanting so badly to be validated that even though he wasn't at his best, he was still worthy and important and essential. And then imagine how painful it must have been to find out that this thing that you have given your absolute all to thanks you by offering you a fraction of what you think you're worth. I think that's all I'm gonna say about that. Again, this is speculation, alleged, alleged. I don't know. I don't know. I don't think anyone will ever really know all of the intricacies of contract negotiations and player caps and blue tax. I don't care. I don't fucking care. Boring. But as I've spoiled for you, after all of that, in July of 2024, it's announced that after 13 seasons with the Golden State Warriors, Clay Thompson was going to be traded to the Dallas Mavericks. Cue all those haters all of a sudden changing their tone. Like, no, Clay. Shut up. Please shut the fuck up. Like, shut the fuck up, right?

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, but honestly, this was a really sad time for Dub Nation. As a farewell post, Clay wrote on his Instagram, oh Bay Area, there are not enough words and images to convey how I really feel about y'all. From the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for the best times of my life. It was such an honor to put that dubs jersey on from day one. I really just wanted to be the best I could be and help bring as many championships as possible to the region. The best part was not the rings, though. It was the friendships I made that will last a lifetime. My family and I would like to thank all of the amazing people who worked tirelessly to make the Warriors organization world class. Don't be sad it's over. Be happy it happened. Until we meet again, see Captain Out. So, yeah, a bittersweet ending for Clay's career as a warrior. All endings are hard, we know that. But it's especially hard for the ones that start off so so well. In his first press conference with the Mavericks, Clay says about the trade, I was probably a little disappointed at first. But then as time goes on, you have a lot of time to reflect and realize what you did. They can't take that away from you as far as the championships. Sometimes breakups are necessary to do what's right. But the thing with a sports breakup is that it's not like you can just block them on everything. You know, NBA is small, babe. You're gonna run into them again. So of course, everyone had their eyes on the next time Clay would be back in the bay to see this ex of his. So the 2024 season starts, and every chance a reporter gets, Clay, how are you feeling about going back to trace?

SPEAKER_02

Clay, what's it gonna be like to play against Steph? Impeccable impressions.

SPEAKER_03

I love the way your teeth just like did a little bit of like a rabbit thing. Like, what is the most annoying way I could ask these questions? That's what it was like. Yeah. So personally, I would be like, um, fuck off, leave me alone. Clay has a little bit more of a subdued response. He says something like, you know, yeah, it'll be good to see some people again, but to me, it's just another regular season game in November. But here's the thing. Again, me in my own thoughts, okay. What I say is unsubstantiated, but you cannot look me in the face and tell me that if it were you, you would not be feeling some type of way to fucking come back there. Yeah. Are you kidding? The anxiety nervous, just imagining. The pressure, the buildup, you know? Okay, so ladies and gentlemen, we have finally reached the part where Nin's cries. Oh, I thought you would have cried at that Instagram post. Oh. I teared up a little. You did. Yeah. So after all of that, let's watch this clip of Clay returning to Chase Center for his first game ever against the Golden State Warriors. If you'd like to follow along, you'll find the link of the YouTube video uploaded by House of Highlights in our show notes. Okay. So Arnes and I just watched that clip. And at the start of this game, the announcer introduces the Dallas Mavericks starting lineup. And of course, the last player to be introduced is Clay. And even before the announcer can say his name, on the Jumbotron in this arena plays a montage of all of these moments of Clay's time with Warriors. From getting drafted, his first press conference as a Warrior, his first, second, third, and fourth championships, his game six highlights, his 37-point quarter, his 14 threes, and him just playing basketball with his teammates, his brothers. At this point, Chase Center is erupting in cheers. I mean, it's it's deafening in there. Everyone's wearing captain hats, everyone's on their feet. Clay's mom is in the stands crying. And as I'm watching this on TV at home, sorry, Clay tickets were like $400 for the nosebleeds. The fake fan. Pandwagon. I turn to Lou as I'm watching this, and I see that he's actually quietly crying. And as I'm putting this story together almost a year later, I asked Lou recently if he could go back to that moment and tell me why he cried. And he said, I don't know, I just felt like this wave of appreciation reminiscing about those good years. But it was almost like it was almost like a piece of me left. And what what's interesting to note is that as this montage is playing, you see Clay's reaction in real time. So they have a shot of his face on the bottom of the screen, so you can see him seeing this video. And he's actually kind of stoic. You know, he's not crying, he's not being overly emotional. Who would? Not me. But who knows? Maybe maybe he was holding it in. I don't know. But I think Lou maybe said it best. Maybe he was feeling too many things all at once. I'm sure he felt the love and gratitude from the fans and the organization and that joy of reliving all of these beautiful moments. But maybe somewhere deep down in there, he could have still been feeling exhausted by it all, angry by how it ended. Or maybe he was grieving still like this piece of him was now gone. Now, why was I crying? I mean, very simply put, I was just gonna miss him, and I was just sad about how everything played out and that this era was ending. And again, I know that some of you may not relate to this story at all because you don't follow basketball, you don't really know the Warriors or Clay. But time and time again, we always talk about how on this podcast it doesn't matter if the surface of our story doesn't resonate with you because underneath that the feelings most certainly do. I think watching all of this happen from the very beginning made me realize that in our own lives we can accept when things are ready to come to an end. But just because something is over doesn't mean that you can't honor what once was. Yes, you can outgrow something, you can change and decide that something you once loved no longer serves you. But that doesn't have to erase all of the good that came from it. That can stay with you. That's that's yours to treasure. And even though it may still hurt in the moment, I hope that with healing and with distance you can one day bravely step back in that place and honor the person you once were and feel safe enough to miss the moments that it made you happy. Clay, you will always be a legend in the bay, but that is only one part of your story, and thank God for it. Thank God that with every highest high and lowest low, there is still so much more yet to come. Enter Megan the Stallion.

SPEAKER_00

I was wondering when you were gonna bring her up.

SPEAKER_01

There are parts of your story that I think I wrote the exact same fucking sentences. And when you came in, you're like, we're gonna talk about sports ball or whatever the fuck you said. I was like, all right, there's no way. There's no way, but yeah.

SPEAKER_00

There is a way.

SPEAKER_03

There's a way of known because I saw a little smirk when I said a little sentence.

SPEAKER_00

So we'll see.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, like what can I even say right now that I'm not about to say right now on my own fucking paper. No, that was beautiful. And you're so right. It doesn't matter if you're a Warriors fan or not. It doesn't matter if you watch basketball. Like, we all know what that's like. But I think what makes it so beautiful is how global this love and this appreciation was. And yes, it's his life. And at the same time, when you're a public figure like that, undoubtedly you have influence over people, over fans, right? That comes with the territory. Yeah. And so to see all those people waiting around.

SPEAKER_00

I think when I realized, I don't have my contacts in.

SPEAKER_01

Once I realized that they were waving the captain hats, I was like, oh, okay. This is what we're doing here. And yeah, yes, fucking like wishy, washy fans, so easy to flip-flop. But when it comes down to it, it's all love, right? Yeah. I mean, that's what it is. Like, you can't erase that. That's yours of treasure. I love how you said that.

SPEAKER_03

And I'm just like thinking, like, what if he was never traded to Dallas? Like, would he have met Megan? I don't know. You know what I mean? Like, when you're in the thick of it, it's so hard to realize that there's something on the other side, you know? Because you're just you're stuck in that place. And it just it breaks my heart that Clay, you know, anyone really goes through these things. And just watching it, I think that's the hard part. It's like you're watching it happen. Yes. You know, it's happening in front of you. But I think that with sports, people so easily forget, yes, it's entertainment, yes, it's a game, but there's so many real things and real feelings happening underneath. Yeah. I can't relate to scoring 37 points in a quarter. I can. Speak for yourself. My top was like 30. But I know what it's like to just be in my head and give something my all and not feel that level of gratitude in return. Alleged.

SPEAKER_00

Asterisk. This is this is fucking speculation. But you know what? It's pretty damn good speculation.

SPEAKER_01

I'm gonna say it's probably like 98% accurate to what was going on in his head. Maybe. But no, I I feel that when you're in the thick of it, it's like at this point in time, or back before he was traded, it was like he's a warrior, like for for life, right? This is this is it, this is this is who he is. But to imagine that there's more beyond that, it's hard to fathom. I'm sure. I'm sure for him.

SPEAKER_03

For us, it was so hard to fathom. I like really had to reckon with that, me personally. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, yeah. We all know what that feels like. We all know how hard and how impossible it feels to look beyond it, but then to be able to take a step back and see how beautiful.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Shout out clay. Shout out clay. That was a slam dunk of a story. Oh shit. I know things.

SPEAKER_00

Go sports. Go sports.

Arns: grieving grandparent TikTok

SPEAKER_03

All right, lay it on me. Okay. I would say hard pivot contextually.

SPEAKER_01

Okay. The message is the same. In fact, we can skip my segment if you want. It's just the same thing. That is so funny. Is it though? Because it all it's just it's just a fact now that this is, and again, I wasn't planning on talking about this. Love it. I ended up being like, if I didn't want to overcomplicate it, I was like, well, what fucking made me cry? Like, what where are the words coming out of me easily? Here we go. Here we fucking go. All right. So I'm I'm gonna do a little story time in lieu of context. You'll see. You'll see.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. I can't wait for it to be the most random fucking subject and it still ties perfectly.

SPEAKER_01

Is what I'm saying. Listeners, if you're new here, crybabies, this is what we do week after week for the most part. I would say our accuracy rate is kind of scary. Probably like 85%.

SPEAKER_03

Arns and I do not ever, well, sometimes we do, but very rarely do we ever tell each other what we're talking about in advance. And for whatever reason, they always end up the same. The same in terms of like feelings. Yes. Yes.

SPEAKER_01

No, but truly. Okay. Story time. When I was a freshman in college, I don't know if you know this, but I spent every Friday with my dad and my grandparents. I would go with my dad, we'd pick up my grandma at her house, and then we would drive to the care home where my grandpa lived. We would pick him up. We'd eat at a restaurant, usually Sizzler. Have you been to Sizzler?

SPEAKER_03

Don't ask me because now Lou's gonna really want to go to Sizzler because I always say no. The the salad hot bar.

SPEAKER_01

Lucian, stop listening. They got like a hot but you can make like a baked potato.

unknown

My god.

SPEAKER_01

Don't sleep on Sizzler. Don't sleep on Sizzler. So we'd go to Sizzler and then we'd go to the mall. We'd walk around a little bit and we'd go home. I'd always fall asleep on the ride home, always. Really? It was like twenty minutes, but I don't know.

SPEAKER_03

Maybe because I've just felt so You were just so tired from basketball practice.

SPEAKER_01

Yes. Obviously. So at this point in time, my grandpa had had a stroke sometime when I was in high school, and he also had dementia. And so that's why he was living in the care home. But he gradually lost command of language, forgot all of his children, grandchildren, didn't know any of us, didn't know who we were, but was still trucking along. We'd pick them up in good spirits. Eventually he forgot how to speak English completely. And then as the dementia progressed, he forgot how to speak Tagalog. The only language he could speak at the end of it was his native tongue, which was a Visayan language called Wadae. And the Visayas, for any non-Filipinos, is a region in the Philippines, and that is where my grandpa's from. But even when my grandpa forgot most of his words, could no longer express himself through language, there are two things that he never forgot. One, a Visayan folk song called Usahai, and two, my grandma. My grandma and my grandpa's relationship, these are my dad's parents. By no means perfect. You're raising six children, you're immigrating separately to the US, like half your kids, you're living apart for years, you're trying to rebuild a life in a brand new country. You're gonna fight, you know? It's not all rainbows and butterflies, but as is the case with so many humans who suffer from dementia, memory loss, logic and reason slowly start to see their way out. But the heart is somehow the last to go. My grandpa always loved my grandma, but I mean the way he loved on her those last few years. During our visits, he would hug and kiss my grandma. If she wasn't around, he would look for her every waking moment. It was as if when the rest of the world melted away, when he lost even his own sense of self, all that was left was his love for her. She was quite literally his reason for waking up in the morning, his entire reason for being. And it wasn't a memory so much as a feeling that he just knew deep down. A feeling of being loved by someone, belonging to someone, and loving that someone back. The reason I bring this all up is because I recently came across a TikTok. You I came across a TikTok. We yeah. To be fair, it wasn't like on my for you page, it was like someone posted about it on Instagram, and then I looked it up on TikTok. So hey, that means you worked even harder to find this. Yes, yes, thank you. But I recently came across a TikTok by user at Paige Armstrong. The O was a zero. Paige is not an influencer, she's just a girl sharing a video of her grandpa. Have you watched this video? Maybe. I've seen every TikTok on TikTok, so maybe. Yeah. In this video, she takes her 95-year-old grandpa to visit her grandmother's grave. No, I have not seen this. I don't need to. I don't need to. It's okay. Her grandma passed six years ago. And her grandpa visits her grandma's grave every single week, but he recently stopped driving. So Paige drove him to the cemetery instead. And in this short video, Paige captures her grandpa, unbeknownst to him, talking to her grandma. I'm gonna link this video below. If you haven't watched this TikTok, please fucking watch it. It's it's 40 seconds, literally 39 seconds. I'm gonna show you the video now. It's a good one.

SPEAKER_04

Okay. That's it.

SPEAKER_01

Nope. Don't listen to her and we're done. Watch it. In this video, I know you're gonna watch it, cry babies, because you gotta, but I'm just gonna narrate what he says. Paige's grandpa says, always did and always will. Here comes your hugs. Mmm. Here comes your kisses. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. I love you. I miss you. Oh my god, do I miss you? I sure love you. Uh-huh. Yep. I love you a whole quarter. In the comments, Paige explains that her grandpa gives her grandma seven kisses because they always wanted to make it to seventy-five years married. They made it to sixty-eight. So the seven kisses were the difference. At the time of this recording, that comment had 10,000 likes. And in the end, when he says, I love you a whole quarter. Paige explains that after they got married, they only had a quarter left to their name. So when they say, I love you a whole quarter, what they're really saying is, I love you with everything I have. Shut up. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Tell me to shut the fuck up, because I would like to shut the fuck up too. It's crazy. It's crazy. It's a crazy video.

SPEAKER_01

Who is his granddaughter?

SPEAKER_03

She's so brutal.

SPEAKER_01

Normal girl. I think she said she loves reading smut or something in her bio. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02

Oh god, no, I love it.

SPEAKER_01

Normal girl, normal girl. But anyone watching this can feel this grandpa's love. He doesn't even realize his granddaughter's recording him, and yet the world, the whole world is watching, being moved over and over and over again. Based on how viral this video went, there's really not much left for me to say that the world hasn't already felt, the comments haven't already touched on, that you haven't already touched on. You know, every day we tell our loved ones, I miss you, I love you, and we mean it, it's very casual. But when this grandpa says, I miss you, God do I miss you, it's devastating. And it's so pure and it's so beautiful. There's an ache to his loss, and yet a fullness to his love. At the time of this recording, six million people have watched this video. And there's a reason why, because to feel a love like this is the crux of our existence. It's why we come to this earth, why we willingly choose to exist among pain and suffering. Because those moments where we find love, we hold on to it with everything we have, and we let it change us. That makes it all worth it. Now, it wouldn't be complete to talk about a TikTok without scouring the comments section. You can imagine how emotional it gets. There are the people who are, of course, laughing about it. My phone now has water damage. All I do is cry for strangers. I that one. Read that one like ten times. Again, originality in the comments. But you know what? And then also can't breathe. Um, but I get it because it's like, well, what the fuck is left for me to say? True, true, true. You know, like you are just so overwhelmed. Yeah. It's fucking, it's too much. As long as they're nice, I'll let it pass. Yeah, yeah. Same. There's also a lot of reminiscing in the comments, especially about love stories between grandparents, the devotion they held. User at Tamara Bruno says, My grandmom had dementia and my grandpa took care of her. We took her for the day to give him a break. And when he picked her up, he said to her, I had one day to myself, and I missed you all day. User at Sabrina McCormick says, I was sitting in my great grandpa's kitchen with him one day, and he turns to me and says, You know, I've never really told anyone this before, but I really miss your grandma. The user at Nova says, This reminds me of my grandpa when my grandma died. At her funeral, he said, I'm so sorry, Barbara, but I lied in our vows. I'll still love you while death parts us. And then there are comments about hope, about remembering what matters in this life, about how this TikTok puts it all in perspective. May a love like this find me. May this kind of love find me and crash into me. Suddenly my problems are so small. In a world where everything is falling apart, these are the videos that fuel us, the ones that make us feel longing and hope, the ones that center us and remind us why we live. And I know I'm not alone in this because millions of people across the world feel it too. I want to end this segment by bringing it back to the song that my grandpa never forgot. Long after my grandpa forgot how to string sentences together, he would croon this melody with such clarity, and this, of course, perfect vibrato. But it's a Visayan love song called Usahai, which translates to sometimes. I don't speak Visaya, so I looked up the English translation. The song is about unrequited love, but the bittersweet opening lyrics still capture the essence of this story so perfectly. Sometimes I dream that you and I have fallen in love. Why do I yearn for you? Yearn for you always in my solitude. So thank you, Paige Armstrong, for sharing this video with the world, for giving us this flash of pain and grief and hope and love and longing. All under 40 seconds. I really do hope this kind of love, in whatever form it may be, finds all of us. And when we find it, I hope we treasure it but never stop being moved by it. Over and over again.

SPEAKER_03

I think in light of my story today, I think that whenever we look at, you know, old cute couples being in love still, you look at it and of course you want that too. Of course you say, like, goals, you know, may this love fucking bombard me, you know. But I I think that it's not necessarily about the longevity of the love, right? Something doesn't need to last a lifetime for it to be beautiful. I don't know, I'm still thinking about my captain, you know. Like just there were some articles where before it, you know, trading had ever even been a thought where he said, you know, I would love to wear this jersey for the rest of my career, and that wasn't the case. He's wearing another number in another color, but that doesn't mean that the love he felt is now completely gone. And so I hope that when we look at these couples whose love transcends life and death and spans decades, that we remember that the love that we have has transcended so many things, not just time. That too is something worth treasuring.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Death was just the factor in this story. That's why the grieving happens, but it doesn't have to, it doesn't even have to be a romantic love. I I think the romantics in all of us are always like, that's what I want. Yeah. But I mean, it is it is such a treasure to feel so intensely and to be so gripped by something and to feel at home in it. It changes us, it becomes our whole lives, and it's such a beautiful thing to allow that to wash over us, and of course, we grieve. Of course, what we grieve when we lose it. Of course, it's such a complex feeling because we're complex people, and that's just how it goes, you know? That's just how it goes. But it's not any less. It's not any less just because you are now grieving. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And it's such a brave thing to me to grieve so openly, to open your heart up to that.

SPEAKER_03

Yes, I I agree. It is brave to be vulnerable, but it's like we all feel this, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Exactly. Wow, like it's so brave to post that. Yeah. But like Hello, like six million other people also fucking feel that way. Yeah. No, exactly. Exactly. And I love that that's something that we are trying to normalize on this pod. Like, this is why we fucking do this work. I would fucking here week after week. By week after bye week. By week after by week.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. Thanks, Paige. Thanks, Paige. Send me your smut racks. I could have made that up.

SPEAKER_01

Let's I should fact check that. But yeah. Normal girl is what I was trying to say. Normal girl.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. Thanks,

Outro

SPEAKER_03

Paige. Thanks, Clay. Thank you, Clay. Do you know I really smirked at our color combination today? I wore blue intentionally because yellow is not in my palette. I didn't think that you would traips in here decked out in gold. So what can I say? We are just aligned. We are. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01

Love it.

SPEAKER_03

Love it. That was a good one. I know. I love that. I like that one this week. This bye week. Well, that's what we got. That's all we got. Did you have fun? Did you laugh? Were you scared?

SPEAKER_02

Dun dun dun dun.

SPEAKER_03

It's kind of the vibe. Horror. You know. Well, thank you for tuning in. We hope that even if you didn't gasp in fear, you at least walk away with some new thoughts percolating in that little head of yours. Some new feelings, maybe? Percolating in that little heart of yours.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. You know? Yeah. If you loved us and you haven't yet had the pleasure of rating us, give us five stars, Apple, Spotify. If you have a story that you want to share that made you cry in your personal life, or if you want to share like something you've watched or read and you you want us to watch and read it and suffer with you, email us hello at beerby cryingpodcast.com, or you can send us a message on our website, beerby cryingpodcast.com. And we are at beerby crying. That's it. That's it. Love you guys. Love ya.

SPEAKER_03

Cry and bye. Crying bye. See you in a fortnight.

SPEAKER_00

We're just gonna come up with crazier ways of saying every two weeks. Same fucking things over and over again.

SPEAKER_03

But until then, beer be crying.